BDSM Glossary

We are always learning and always adding to this BDSM glossary. If you feel something is missing or something requires an update, please email us at info@bound-by-desire.com. Thank You!

• 24/7: A BDSM relationship where power dynamics or protocols are active at all times.
• Abrasion: Using a rough surface or friction to stimulate or sensitize the skin.
• ABDL (Adult Baby/Diaper Lover): Ageplay involving adult baby role-playing or enjoyment from wearing/using diapers.
• Aftercare: Time after a scene for emotional and physical support, helping participants decompress.

• BDSM: Acronym covering Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, and Sadism/Masochism.
• Blackmail: Consensual blackmail using sensitive material to keep a submissive engaged.
• Bondage: Physical restraint of a partner, sometimes limited to specific areas, like breast bondage.
• Bottom: Partner who receives sensation or action in a scene.
• Brat/Bratting: A playful, disobedient submissive aiming to provoke their dominant.
• Breast Bondage: Binding the breasts to flatten or enhance their shape.
• Breast Torture: Painful stimulation or torture of the breasts.
• Breath Control Play: Restricting oxygen to heighten arousal, using methods like choking or smothering.
• Butt Plug: Insertable toy for rectal pleasure, sometimes used with pet play by adding a tail.

• Chastity: Erotic or orgasm denial, often using a device that limits access to genitals.
• Cock and Ball Torture (CBT): Torture of the penis and testicles.
• Collared: Status indicating that a submissive is "owned" by a dominant.
• Collaring: Formal commitment or ownership ceremony between dominant and submissive.
• Contrapolar Stimulation: Stimulation combining both pleasure and pain.
• Consensual Non-Consent (CNC): Power play where a dominant can act as though consent is waived, with pre-consent given.
• Consent: Mutual agreement to engage in activities within a scene or dynamic.

• D/s: Dominance and submission, representing psychological and emotional power exchange.
• DDlg: Nurturing dynamic where a "Daddy Dom" cares for a "little girl" submissive.
• Dungeon Monitor (DM): Person who enforces rules and ensures safety at BDSM events.
• Dom: Individual exercising control in a scene, typically a male identifier.
• Dominant: Partner who has control in a BDSM relationship.
• Domme: Female-identifying dominant.
• Domspace: Euphoric mental state experienced by a dominant during a scene.
• Dungeon: Space or room equipped for BDSM play.

• Edgeplay: High-risk BDSM activity, which can vary in risk level by individual.
• Enema Play (Klismaphilia): Use of enemas for sexual stimulation or humiliation.
• Erotic Humiliation: Degrading a partner consensually for arousal.
• Erotic Sexual Denial: Prolonged arousal by preventing orgasm.
• Erotic Spanking: Spanking used for arousal or gratification.

• Figging: Insertion of peeled ginger root into the anus, vagina, or urethra.
• Financial Domination (Findom): BDSM dynamic where a submissive provides financial gifts to a dominant.
• Fisting: Inserting a hand into the vagina or anus.
• Forced Orgasm: Dominant induces orgasm without submissive’s control.

• Genitorture: Torture of the genitals.
• Golden Showers: Urination on or by another person during BDSM play.
• Good Pain / Bad Pain: Distinction between pleasurable and harmful pain.

• Handkerchief Codes: Color and placement of handkerchiefs indicating sexual interests, often in LGBTQ+ contexts.
• Hard Limits: Non-negotiable boundaries that someone will not engage in.
• Hogtie: Binding wrists and ankles behind the back using rope or cuffs.

• Impact Play: Form of sensation play involving impact, using tools like whips, paddles, and floggers.
• Inspection: Scene where a submissive is examined, sometimes for erotic objectification.

• Kinbaku (Shibari): Japanese rope bondage that emphasizes aesthetics and intricate patterns.
• Kinky Sex: Any sexual act generally considered unconventional or outside vanilla norms.
• Knife Play: Sensation play involving the slow use of knives without cutting the skin, where fear often enhances the experience.

• Limits: Boundaries in BDSM, divided into hard (non-negotiable) and soft (negotiable).

• Masochism: Deriving pleasure from receiving pain.
• Masochist: Individual who enjoys pain.
• Master/slave: Relationship dynamic with a structured power exchange.
• MDLB: Female-led nurturing dynamic where a "Mommy Domme" cares for a "little boy" submissive.
• Mummification: Full-body bondage that completely immobilizes a partner.
• Munch: Casual, non-sexual meetup for people in the BDSM community.

• Needle Play: Temporary piercings done with sterile needles.
• Nose Torture: BDSM activity involving clamps or hooks on the nose.

• Pain Slut: Someone who enjoys receiving high levels of pain.
• Pegging: Insertion of a strap-on dildo into a partner’s anus, typically male.
• Play Party: BDSM social gathering with designated play areas.
• Ponyboy/Ponygirl: Submissive role where a person acts like a pony, wearing attire like a mouth bit or tail.
• Post-Orgasm Torture: Stimulating sensitive genitals right after orgasm, often causing discomfort.
• PRICK (Personal Responsibility, Informed, Consensual Kink): Emphasizes informed risk and responsibility in BDSM.
• ProDom: Male professional dominant who charges for BDSM services.
• ProDomme: Female professional dominant who charges for BDSM services.
• Pup-Play / Puppy Play: Role-play where a submissive behaves like a dog, usually for emotional or playful stimulation.
• Pussy Torture: Painful or intense stimulation of the vulva or vagina for sexual gratification.

• RACK (Risk-Aware Consensual Kink): Emphasis on participants’ informed acceptance of risks.
• Rhaphanidosis: Insertion of a radish root into the anus.
• Rope Bondage: Using rope to restrain or bind a partner.
• Ruination: Bringing someone to the edge of orgasm but denying release.

• Sadism: Gaining pleasure from inflicting pain.
• Sadist: Individual who enjoys inflicting pain consensually.
• Safe, Sane, and Consensual (SSC): Emphasis on consent and safety within BDSM activities.
• Safeword: Agreed word or gesture to signal a need to pause or stop a scene.
• Scat Play: Use of feces in BDSM play.
• Scene: The setting and actions within a BDSM play session.
• Sensation Play: Activities stimulating physical senses.
• Service Submission: Submissive role focused on serving a dominant.
• Slave: Submissive who gives control to a dominant.
• Soft Limits: Activities that may be tried but with hesitation or caution.
• Squick: Discomfort toward specific BDSM activities without moral judgment.
• Sub Drop: Physical or emotional effects after a scene, which may require aftercare.
• Submissive (Sub): Partner who gives up control in a BDSM relationship.
• Subspace: Euphoric state that submissives can experience during a scene.
• Switch: Individual who can take on either submissive or dominant roles.
• Tit Torture: Painful stimulation or torture of the breasts or nipples.
• TNG (The Next Generation): BDSM groups catering to younger members, typically ages 18–35.
• Top: Partner performing actions in a BDSM scene.
• Topping from the Bottom: Submissive attempting to control the scene.
• TPE (Total Power Exchange): Full authority of a dominant over a submissive.
• Training: Teaching submissive behavior based on dominant’s preferences.

• Vanilla: Non-BDSM practices or people not involved in BDSM.
• Wax Play: Dripping hot wax on a partner as a form of sensation play.

• WIITWD (What It Is That We Do): Broad term referring to BDSM activities.